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Have you ever noticed that some people just can’t take a compliment?

I invest a ton of time and energy reminding Christ-followers (including myself) of the importance of encouraging one another.  But have you noticed that some people are hard to encourage?

They may not even realize it. But a compliment triggers something inside them that shouts, “you are unworthy.”  For whatever reason, they feel awkward being appreciated.

Copyright: ivelin DepositPhoto18908817

Before I mention the three steps to accepting a compliment let’s briefly look at some reasons people struggle.

Why Some People Can’t Receive a Compliment

Insecurity or Fear

They might be afraid that they can’t live up to the higher standard in the future. Some people have been bullied into submission by friends or family members afraid of being outshined.  They’ve been conditioned to think it is unsafe to be celebrated.

Perfectionism

They might feel unworthy because they are intensely aware of the imperfections in the product or performance that the average person would never even notice.

Pride

This comes from a different place.  To give the benefit of the doubt, some people have worked very hard to be able to fulfill their role in life.  Whether it be an entertainer, teacher, speaker, or political leader, they may feel that the average person isn’t even qualified to evaluate their performance.  To be fair, I’m not sure I would want to have an untrained person conduct an annual review that would impact my salary or job security.  But anytime we offer a product or service to the world, every single consumer is in the position to evaluate our offering as worthy of their time and hard-earned money.

Whatever the reason, I have seen people so uncomfortable in receiving a compliment, that they belittle or even abuse the person giving the compliment.  In an effort to appear humble, some people reject the compliment by criticizing themselves to compensate for the compliment.  I’m often amazed at how willing humans are to pounce on the self-destruct button.

How to Give a Compliment

I write much about how to encourage people but for now, I want to focus on an important character trait—humility. Continue Reading…

Get Your Message Heard

October 18, 2017

A few years ago, I felt a stirring deep within that God was getting me ready for something new.

Change isn’t always easy.  Overcoming fear or procrastination can make Goliath seem like a cub scout.  But like the expression goes, sometimes it’s “Change or Die!”

Image copyright: iqoncept DepositPhoto.com ID: 5078752

I wasn’t quite sure what it would look like and where He would lead but it was clear that something new was coming.  I knew that God had given me a message to share.  Somehow, I had a sense that it would include writing and maybe speaking.

Over the next couple of years, I spent a lot of time seeking God and learning new skills.  In many ways, I am still learning and still on that journey.  Let me share some of the people and resources that have helped me tremendously.

Writing

I attended a workshop with John C. Maxwell and Michael Hyatt about Continue Reading…

If you’re not feeling as productive today as you did in the past, you’re not alone.  It’s a new day with distractions galore.  You may have read my article earlier this week in which I shared all the distractions that I dealt with (or tried to) while reading and writing about staying focused.  Why Is Time Management So Elusive?

We live in a day where people are constantly busy but sometimes we’re just spinning our wheels.  Just like the hamster, we can find ourselves going full speed but not making any progress.  Then our friends and families get whatever leftover energy we might have left when we finally make it back home.  Not to mention churches, synagogues, and other community organizations that we value but don’t have the time or energy to serve with our full focus.

There is hope.  We can live in a way that allows us to be free to focus on what truly matters.

Pic: I'm too busy to be less busy.

I have enjoyed watching Michael Hyatt develop from a behind-the-scenes corporate executive to an in-demand, mainstage speaker, best-selling author, and productivity expert.

He has developed a program, entitled Free to Focus designed to help us be able to focus on those relationships that truly matter in our lives.  The registration period only last through Friday, September 29.   If you are interested or would just like to learn more, please click here http://freetofocus.com/WLEAFS/2017f2fsales

Michael Hyatt, NY Times Best-Selling author and former CEO of Thomas Nelson Publishers, offers some very helpful real-world advice in this free online training today, September 29,  at 11:00 a.m., 5:00 p.m., or 9:00 p.m.  Eastern Time.  You can register here http://freetofocus.com/WLEAFS/2017webinar

I believe in it so much that I signed up as an affiliate to help get the word out.  Please feel free to share this with your work team and friends.

Thank you

Kevin

Read the Bible? Me?

April 27, 2017

You might ask, how does someone go from not reading any kind of book for six years and then start reading the Bible? Allow me to share my story.

Continue Reading...

Help for Writers

December 16, 2014

Although, I have much to learn, I’d like to share with you some of the influences that have helped me tremendously in my own writing and I’m sure will be a great help to you wherever you may be in your own development as a writer.  I especially wanted to let you know about an online course that is currently accepting new students.

Photo:  Leszekglasner Deposit Photos 18383043

Photo: Leszekglasner Deposit Photos 18383043

About a year ago, I began sensing that God was leading me in a new direction. I wasn’t sure what that direction would look like or where He would lead, but I stepped out in faith. As some time passed, I began to realize that writing would somehow play a part in that future direction.

I had developed a particularly meaningful and well-received sermon over the years and thought that might form the basis for a book. The thought was equally exciting and terrifying! As I started to develop the thought, I realized that although I had written some articles over the years, I had never entertained the thought of actually writing a book! After all, just reading a book took some effort for me. (I remember John Trent one time remarking that “I’ve written more books than I’ve read.”)

So, I knew nothing at all about writing a book, I set out to learn as much as I could. Continue Reading…